Babies and such

Conny, most certainly not experiencing labor pains.

I'm always trying to maintain some sort of rhythm in my life, but frankly it's pretty difficult when you know that any minute your wife could go into labor. Not only are any long term plans on hold, I don't even feel safe going to the bar for a beer. You never know what could start happening in those two hours or so, and the last thing I want to do is show up at the hospital smelling like fermented hops, my wife wafting German-language criticisms at me in sync to the primeval pangs of impending motherhood.

A part of my anxiety comes from last night, when the midwife that conducts our birthing class gave us a very vivid interpretation of what the various stages of labor look and sound like. It involved a lot of heavy breathing, moaning, and what appeared to be representations of a great deal of pain and provoked furled eyebrows and a few open-mouthed stares from the several couples in attendance. The performance was indeed convincing and made me very thankful to be a man, but also certain that I don't want to have be coping with something even slightly resembling a hangover while fulfilling my Support Role... another reason I probably won't be visiting the bar anytime soon.

But beyond being slave to an obviously impending stroke of nature -- something that restricts how I use my freetime, but in the end, not something that bothers so much -- there are of course a lot of other things to take care of for our soon to be expanding household, many of which require the attention of a person who is medically permitted to lift items weighing more than 5 kilograms and who doesn't need to take regular naps. Only recently have Conny and I fully started to comprehend the practical implications of our child's arrival -- that she will soon be living with us and require a variety of services (to be rendered by ourselves) and baby care products (to be purchased with our money). It was therefore necessary to spend the entire day today cataloging the items that we already have and purchasing a few odds and ends that we hadn't yet acquired. We accomplished this in part at a store on Kurfurstendamm called Baby-Walz, which is I suppose something like Babies R Us but in European format, i.e., less tacky but more expensive.

There, where I was certainly one of the few adult males ever to have set foot, one could find quite a thorough assortment of baby items, from breast pumps (a technology I doubt I will ever fully appreciate) to rectal thermometers (ouch) to designer diaper pails. While I found the sheer economics of it all to be a bit overwhelming and displeasing, I must say when I came across a wee tot or lass in the course of the shopping day, it was quite pleasing to think that the wife and I will soon be nurturing our own small person, who hopefully will -- at some point, at least -- appreciate my wit, good looks, and 'blog' entries. In other wods, I think that in the end, as the cliché goes, I think it will all be worth it.